We don't lose hope, we give it up.....

Sometimes you get to the place where hope no longer exists. Any circumstance that might produce hope, that might give a glimmer of hopeful expectation for you, instead breeds a cynicism that dictates there must be some other reason for the good that might otherwise make you feel hopeful. Too many times your hopes have been dashed, your desires for better once again dissolved into nothingness. Hopeless. It is a devastating destination.

However, there is a basic flaw in this approach to life. Hope. Is. A. Choice. We CHOOSE to let circumstances dictate our attitudes toward life. We choose to focus on details that will encourage us toward hope, or we choose to focus and submit to details that murder what hope we may have and plunge us into the muck of discouragement and despondency. We don't lose hope. We give it up. Yes. And I want my hope back. I suffer hopelessness because I place my hope foolishly. I hope in things and people who will consistently fail me. rob me of my hope, and lead me into hopelessness and despair.

What then, if I am to choose wisely, are my choices? Not circumstances, not others, not even myself. All will eventually let me down, lead me astray, and disillusion me. This is not a multiple choice question. There is only one answer: God...... He is hope. His steadfast love gives us hope. He will never fail us. (That does not mean we will get everything we want.) But because He is trustworthy, we can depend on the fact that there is good ahead for us, regardless of our circumstances. There is purpose in life, no matter how the past wants to drag us back there. There is reason to move forward no matter how far back I have fallen....

There is reason to hope, no matter how many times we have been disappointed. In Him is hope.......choose wisely.....

....broken pieces....

I've been thinking a lot about being broken....We are all broken. For some of us, that is easier to acknowledge than it is for others. But, still, it is there. Some of us are broken in half, devastated and without hope. Others of us are just (in our minds) chipped, the perfection barely broken. Nonetheless............

 I walked along a sandy beach, impressed, inspired, in thought...
Gazing on the ocean, vast, amazing wonders wrought.
How insignificant was I to stand along this shore?
The power represented here, the mighty ocean's roar!
My quest that day, to seek out the shells thrown up by waves each night;
To find the perfect specimens, pleasing to my sight.
No chips, no cracks, no barnacles to mare its surface. Then
I'd pick it up, the chosen one, approved. I'd smile again.
But more and more I'd toss them back, rejected for their scars.
The broken ones were everywhere, as many as the stars.
And as I looked, so many had the possibility
For beauty on their broken backs or underneath to see.
The colors, shapes and textures they represented each,
Were strewn in multitudes across that sandy beach.
I looked at my collection, then and stopped to think anew.
The ones I had were merely whole, but beautiful were few.
I turned around and started back, discarded ones to find.
I wanted them, the broken ones, they were on my mind.
For suddenly, I realized they represented me.
Broken, yes, but even more, remolded perfectly!
All tumbled in the ocean sand and slammed against the shore,
Each shell had come to me that day from off the ocean floor.
Each had its own story, its journey from the deep
That represented its own struggles....then I began to weep.
The ocean was my life that day, and me the broken shell.
My Savior, the collector there, and He was choosing well.
"I know how I can use this one!" He said and then picked me.
And in my Savior's hand then, I knew that He could see
Beauty there within myself I did not recognize.
He wanted me, He'd use my life. I'd value in His eyes.
So as I left the beach that day, wonders in my soul,
I had to smile. I had to praise. For Christ had made me whole!

rdb, 3/14

When did I stop thinking life was dessert?

The young boy, intent on his destination, entered the forest under a canopy of vibrant green, spring leaves just emerging on the branches above him. But he didn't notice. He walked on velvety moss, moist and full of recent rains. But it did not catch his attention. Sounds and creatures all around him clamored for recognition, to no avail. Then. He stumbled and fell, a bruised toe quickly embraced in his little hand. His focused determination to move through the forest was halted and he was forced to be still right where he was. Slowly, he began to notice.....things. A bird's nest hung precariously in the branch, just out of reach. As he watched, the mother bird arrived to four famished, cheeping babies. A rustle in the bushes next to him followed with a small brown body, striped down the back. A chipmunk. He lay back to watch the world around him. For several minutes, life revealed itself to him, beautiful, wonderful, promising. This forest could be my life.....And occasionally, God orchestrates the opportunity for me to halt. Be still. And see that He is good. How many children will rush through and tolerate dinner, just to get to the dessert? What a shame that the meal has not been enjoyed, also. What if dessert WAS the meal. What if the meal was as good AS dessert? What wonders am I missing in my life because I am so busy I cannot notice or take time to appreciate them? To what extent does my life indicate that I am in control and do not have time to be grateful for the dessert all around me? Am I working toward making my life happy when I could BE happy as I move through every day, on my way to.....wherever it is the Lord is taking me? Perhaps instead of dragging the Lord along, convincing Him this is the right way, the best plan, I should slow down. Stop. Walk WITH Him, waiting to see what He has planned and enjoying the forest as we go.....

I shall not be shaken....

So, you know that moment when something happens, you see something, someone says something.....and it just takes the wind out of your sails? Your ship shutters, slows, stops.....Some times, you have to remind yourself to breathe. Time changes to slow motion as you reconnect yourself to reality. You feel shaken to the very core of your being. Yeah, that moment. Been there. Did that. Today. I wanted to mentally shake my head, blink my eyes. Hard. Processing. Processing. My heart and demeanor said, "Okay. That's it. That's all. I'm tired of this mess. I don't have to do this. I will not accept this in my life. Nope. Done. Forget it. Not going there any more. All this while the Holy Spirit tries to speak truth to me. You know the scenario where a kid is caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He knows he's done for. But he really wants the cookie, no matter what. So, he grabs what he can and crams as much as possible into his mouth as his mom moves toward him. Or you know what your friend is going to say, so you put your hands over your ears and sing Mary Had a Little Lamb to drown out that voice. Yep that's me and my Comforter. Why do I become "weary in well doing"? Why am I willing to abandon the fight and give it up? I have lost my vision for the end of the game. I've forgotten the future for which I fight. I look only at my present pain and have no concern for what God has planned ahead for me. I forget my adversary, Satan, who wants nothing more than for me to collapse in the dirt and moan my sorrows to anyone who will listen. No. NO! NO! NO! I will not switch teams. So, I put the cookie back and take my hands from my ears. Psalm 62: For God alone my soul waits in silence; He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be greatly shaken. For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from Him. Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us.